A Little Bit of Community LOVE Shout-out

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I love how Nicaraguans love.

Some can say that their culture is too nosey, everyone knows everyone’s business, people talk too much, they want to know everything about you…

But for me it’s perfect.

They care.

I have never felt so loved as when someone asked me if I’ve eaten breakfast or lunch or dinner, and if I haven’t, they hurry me to a chair and grab me a plate of food, a Big Cola, and ask me if the 5 pounds of food they’ve put in front of me is enough.

If I mention I have a headache or stomachache or some weird skin problem, they call me “Pobrecita” and find medicine to fix me up.

When I need a place to sleep, I have an open invitation to several houses that will make sure I have a bed.

If I take time to look nice and do my hair, put on makeup, someone always notices and compliments me.

When I am having a difficult moment and just don’t want to talk about it, I know several people I can go to that will just sit with me and keep me company.

If I’m having a rough hair day, there’s always someone to comb my hair and make me presentable again. If it’s worse than just a bad ponytail…I have the best lice picker-outers that a girl could want.

There’s always someone worrying themselves for my well-being and making sure that I’m doing well.

They want to know every little detail of my family and friends and my life in the States.

Even if I try to hide how I’m feeling, at least one person can tell that something’s going on and will pray for me or encourage my heart.

They are genuinely interested in the lives of people close to them.

And that’s how village life is!

You know everything about everyone and a lot of times it’s more than you need to know.

But I would take that any day over a community of cold, self-focused, individualistic  people that keep to themselves.

I love living a life fully open to my community and sharing in the joys, hardships, trials, and victories of the journey we’re all on to bring a little bit of heaven to earth.

Heart Vomit

OH MAN.

These past couple months.

I don’t even know where to start.

Actually, I’d really like to start by saying I am OVER-JOYED to announce that we have come up with COMPLETE funding for my precious Alan David to get his MRI taken to find out if a tumor in his leg is cancerous or not. A HUGE thank you to Jessalyn Bradfield for raising the money! Read about what happened to him at the end of this blog.

1078933_10200944325083613_1273533181_oJesus knew I needed a miracle with this one. I spent some time today interceding in prayer for various situations that have been/are still going on in my life and lives of those that I love. One of which was Alan, and the fact that we didn’t have the money to take him to get an MRI for his leg. I have seen the X-rays, I know how bad it looks. I just need to know how bad it really is. I am confident that God can and will heal Alan, but we NEEDED to get a move on with the medical procedures.
So after I had prayed for awhile, I tried to take a nap as I wasn’t feeling so great. I couldn’t sleep so I decided to check my e-mails. The first thing that popped up was an e-mail from Jessalyn saying that 45 minutes after she posted a fund-raiser on Facebook, the entire amount had been raised. I sat there crying, marveling at the goodness of God and this huge answer to prayer.
Please continue in your prayers for Alan and his family as we begin to move forward and start going to appointments and getting good or bad news. There is a purpose and a plan in all this, I truly believe, and God is at work.

Another thing y’all could be praying for is I am getting hit over and over again with different sicknesses and illnesses and infections and such. Migraines, stomach pain, skin infection, cold, cough…all in the past week and a half. It just adds to all the emotional struggles I’ve been having and makes me a real miserable person to be around. Not to mention I have had more things stolen this week than I have in my entire time I’ve been living in Nicaragua.

August started with Brandon leaving and me taking over Worship completely. It’s gone well so far, and although I had been looking to this time with hesitancy and fear of failure, I am starting to feel a lot more comfortable with it all. Me taking over 100% means I am responsible for all practices, picking out songs, setting up the stage, playing the music by myself, and dealing with any issues that might come up. The thing that was the most met with trepidation by me was playing piano all by myself and that being the only music. But this is a great opportunity for me to grow more in the music aspect of worship since I have been absent from it for awhile. Once I found out my true love is singing, piano got pushed to the side for so long, especially since I was extremely spoiled with AMAZING musician friends. I am excited for this new season and the way God is already working in unity and vulnerability within our team.

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And now the real messy stuff. This is titled Heart Vomit for a reason.
I have been struggling emotionally lately. To be completely honest, I have been feeling really useless and replaceable.
These are feelings that have plagued me my entire life and have been the cause of much strife and depression.
I really thought I had worked it all through with God, but He is trying to take me into a deeper place of healing.
I feel stuck in some ways. I want to move forward but I don’t know where the Lord wants me. I don’t want to move backwards though and mess anything up. I am really actually a control freak if you haven’t figured that out by now. Hi, welcome to my life.
I have been fighting against community, against making an effort to be involved and not wanting to be the first one to make a move.
My heart aches for someone to live here and want to be with me and understand me.
I love and cherish my time with the people I live with and work with but I just don’t have that relationship with anyone here.
I want to be needed and wanted and desired.
I get upset too easily when people aren’t perfect.
This is who I am and what I’m going through now and it seems impossibly hopeless.
I feel like I’m wandering a lot right now emotionally and just NEEDING and CRAVING a place to rest and take a break from all the mental tension I’m unnecessarily putting on myself.

Thankfully, my Jesus cares for me in unfathomably perfect ways and is just preparing me for times that I will need to be stronger than what I think I’m capable of right now. So He puts things like today’s Jesus Calling right in front of my face for me to find hope and life.

“Understanding with never bring you peace. That’s why I have instructed you to trust in Me, not in your understanding. Human beings have a voracious appetite for trying to figure things out, in order to gain a sense of mastery over their lives. But the world presents you with an endless series of problems….My Peace is into an elusive goal, hidden at the center of some complicated maze. Actually you are always enveloped in my Peace…”

It’s as simple as this: The Lord is preparing me for something greater than I can imagine. You can be sure the enemy would love nothing more than to stop this grand purpose and have his way with my life. But God promises this will not come to pass if I rely on my faith and trust in Him,

“…the Lord is true to His promises; He will hold you up and guard you against the evil one….May the Lord guide your hearts into God’s pure love and keep you headed straight into the strong and sure grip of the Anointed One.”
– 2 Thessalonians 3:3 & 5

Pray for my heart please.
Jesus is renewing it and re-starting the fire he placed in it from the day I was created.
I love my life with everything inside me but nobody ever promised me it would be easy.
Life as a missionary in a village in a third world country was never going to be an easy thing.
But it’s worth it. It’s SO worth it.
Every victory over-shadows any discouragement that’s come along.
I believe with all my soul that GOOD WILL WIN.
The victory is ours.

Subscribe to Haille’s Nicaragua e-mail updates

Thank you for your continued support of the journey God’s put me on! If you would like to see pictures, feel free to add me on FaceBook. They upload faster on there. If you feel led to make a donation, there are a few ways you can go about that:

1. Write a check and send to Life Church. Make check out to Life Church, put Haille Krieg in the memo line, and send to 7001 Haggerty Rd, Canton MI 48187

2. Send money electronically through Life Church’s PayPal account. You can find that here: http://www.lifechurchcanton.org/#/about-life/financial-contributions. Make sure you specify that it’s for Haille Krieg.

3. Set up an Elexio account to have an amount taken out of your bank account each month. Log into Elexio Pulse https://lifechurch.elexiopulse.com and click on the “My Giving” link to the far right, you’ll see not only your history in giving, you’ll see a large link in the upper left that says “click here to Give Online”.  If you don’t have an Elexio account you will go to the above link and click on “need an account?” and follow the prompts.

All donations are tax deductible, which is one of the reasons for me going through my church. Life Church does send out donation statements for your tax purposes.

A Heart Full of Potential

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This is my friend Ariel.

His family and closest friends call him Chapo.

I wish I could explain it….but sometimes down here, people are just called a certain name, and it doesn’t mean anything, and that’s just how it is.

Ariel has been so dear to my heart ever since I’ve been down here. We’re the same age, he loves to sing, and he is just a hilarious person in general and I am super close to his family. That shirt he’s wearing in the picture? I bought it. We’re great friends.

Ariel is a driven person. He’s only the 2nd person in his large family to graduate high-school. He is going to University right now to study Law. It wasn’t his favorite at first, and he even thought about changing his major, but he stuck it out and is now starting to put what he’s learning into practice and it’s interesting and fun.

Ever since I came here and started working with the worship program, Ariel was always on my heart and mind about it, and was one of the few youth who stuck it out with me all these 9 months that changes have come and gone and growing has happened.

It’s a beautiful thing to see him worship. He sings with all his heart and soul. At the top of his lungs, Ariel praises His Savior.

The problem was, there is no way to serve two masters. No one can serve God and praise him with all their heart if their mind is thinking about how people will view them. If your heart is in a place where you don’t want to give absolutely everything over to God – your relationships with others, judgement, grudges….your mind will not be completely concentrating on where your praise is going. I always knew Ariel had it in him to worship with everything inside, a limitless potential to be a devoted man of God, but the enemy was fighting against it. The enemy was trying to convince him that he could do both things, lead his congregation in worship and still act like all the other youth of his village – holding grudges and caring about peoples’ opinions of him.

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Last Wednesday for youth group, we had a bonfire under the stars with some extended iPod worship time. Cadence taught about forgiveness. About how being the bigger person pays off and love always wins. No matter how you are received, being right with God and forgiving will always be the best thing for you personally.

After the message and some more worship, Saul opened the night up for the youth to share what was on their hearts and what they thought about everything that had been said.

Ariel stood up right away, hands shaking, but with a determination clearly visible, and said that he had something to say.
He started talking about how for years, he would get angry about small, stupid things and then just not talk to the person he was mad at. He had ruined friendships for his pride and didn’t like that that’s who the person he had become. He said sorry and asked forgiveness from the entire group of youth for any way he had hurt them in the past and told everyone he really wanted to change. He even singled 3 people out and personally apologized for things he had said and done in the past. One of these people used to be his best friend. For more than 3 months, they hadn’t talked and had just avoided each other like the plague.
This person didn’t want any of Ariel’s apology.
But Ariel pursued him. He didn’t give up after the first time he asked forgiveness and tried to talk with him. He didn’t give up after he got shot down the second time. He tried a third time and this friend finally broke down to talk, just the two of them.
They’re back to being best friends now, talking, laughing, joking, hanging out, and whatever else it is that 20-year old guys do here…I’m still not completely sure what that is.

As Ariel walked back with me to my house under the moon and stars, I got to hear more of his heart and what God was changing in him. He was a different man, walking with bravery and FREEDOM. I know that worship will now be a new and more wonderful experience for him as the Lord shows him how much he delights in his vulnerable heart.

I am so incredibly proud of his courage to do something as big as what he did in front of so many of his peers.
I wish I could just explain how huge this was and how RARE that one of our youth would confess like Ariel did.
It was a great encouragement to me that this could be the future of the men in Candelaria and Nicaragua.
My prayers have only gotten stronger for a new generation of men that are full of the Holy Spirit and willing to be VULERABLE and ENCOURAGING to those around them.

Subscribe to Haille’s Nicaragua e-mail updates

Thank you for your continued support of the journey God’s put me on! If you would like to see pictures, feel free to add me on FaceBook. They upload faster on there. If you feel led to make a donation, there are a few ways you can go about that:

1. Write a check and send to Life Church. Make check out to Life Church, put Haille Krieg in the memo line, and send to 7001 Haggerty Rd, Canton MI 48187

2. Send money electronically through Life Church’s PayPal account. You can find that here: http://www.lifechurchcanton.org/#/about-life/financial-contributions. Make sure you specify that it’s for Haille Krieg.

3. Set up an Elexio account to have an amount taken out of your bank account each month. Log into Elexio Pulse https://lifechurch.elexiopulse.com and click on the “My Giving” link to the far right, you’ll see not only your history in giving, you’ll see a large link in the upper left that says “click here to Give Online”.  If you don’t have an Elexio account you will go to the above link and click on “need an account?” and follow the prompts.

All donations are tax deductible, which is one of the reasons for me going through my church. Life Church does send out donation statements for your tax purposes.