“The reason we see hypocrisy and fraud and unreality in others is because they are all in our own hearts.”
–Oswald Chambers “My Utmost for His Highest” (June 22)
The other day I was thinking about someone.
Someone who has wronged me in many ways and who I am VERY judgmental towards.
This past week God has been healing me of that and soothing my heart towards the situation, impressing on me to (as always) take the plank out of my eye before telling that other person about the speck in theirs and letting me know that His love is enough to take care of every wound to my heart.
So I already had this on my mind….when BAM.
Oswald slaps me in the face (yet again) with this devotion. Particularly that quote at the top of this blog.
It got me thinking….
How true that the only reason I recognize sin in other people is because I have it in myself and I know what it looks like. I KNOW sin. I know it’s attributes, how it acts, what the thought process behind it is, why it does what it does…
I KNOW sin.
What a terrible thing to think of.
If I was completely pure, completely free of any stain or tarnish to my innocence, would I even understand sin?
I don’t believe so.
There’s a verb in Spanish…well a couple of them actually. They both mean to know. Saber translates like you know OF. You possess knowledge of. Conocer means you KNOW . You are familiar with.
See how there’s a difference?
Well, I am really uncomfortable with the fact that I KNOW sin. I don’t want to! I can see now how sin has left lasting impressions on my mind, my thought, my actions.
Consider how Jesus talks about hating your brother in your mind being the same as killing him in real life.
Sometimes I can sit for awhile, thinking about and being angry at people, judging them…all these nasty things. That, as I have come to believe, is DWELLING in sin. I am letting it soak into me, permeating the joy that God is trying to give me.
Every time I am judging someone on their sin, I am experiencing sin myself. EVERY TIME. And…let’s be real, that’s a LOT.
The more I dwell in sin, the more natural it becomes, it doesn’t feel uncomfortable or wrong anymore. It’s near impossible to control your mind. And that’s just depressing.
The more I DWELL in sin, the more I come to KNOW sin and everything about it.
It all comes back to not letting yourself get into that trap. You can undo the damage you’ve done, believe me. With Christ, there’s always a way back to Him. He’s always waiting for you to figure out what you’re doing wrong and come alongside you to help you get to a different place.
For me right now, I’m just discovering that I conocer sin way more than I feel comfortable with. Actually, I would rather not be familiar with it at all. I would rather saber sin and only be aware of it, not become connected to it.
I’m working on cleansing my mind each and every time I get that bitter feeling in my thoughts.
We’ll see how it goes. Pray for me please?